It remains a mystery how two love birds who were grossly engrossed with each other could turn enemies overnight. The beautiful tales of affection, the candlelight of romance, and the fanciful memories of care all flushed down the drain as a once beautiful bond turns into an abusive one.
It hurts painfully to detach yourself from a partner that you professed eternity to, but for safety and wellbeing, there is no justification why you shouldn’t learn how to quit a toxic relationship.
It becomes so confusing when you are in love with the person, when you guys live together or there is a child involved in the union. At this point, you are earnestly praying that your lover could change and restore the beauty you shared as a healthy relationship. You wish he will go back to becoming the prince charming you feel in love with.
But no matter how hard you try to make it work, the negotiations and compromise, going out of your way to make things even, it all ends in tears, living you with no option to walk away.
Leaving a toxic relationship is not always easy as it is not easy to break strong bonds of love. The pain that could arise might motivate you to continue tolerating the toxicity of your relationship
Is it okay to leave a toxic relationship?
It is okay to leave a toxic relationship and there is nothing wrong with doing so. Toxic relationships are characterized by betrayals, abuses, hurt, and pain. To guard your mental health and the state of your mind, you must break off from any relationship that is unhealthy.
This process might leave you with doubts and feelings of guilt that will suggest that you remain with your partner, but for your safety, walking away is a wise option.
Extreme cases of toxicity in relationships usually escalate to physical abuse, assaults, or even deaths. To avoid these tragic occurrences, it is better to walk out while you still can.
What are the signs of a toxic relationship?
Every relationship will always have setbacks and sad moments, but the reoccurrence of these dark hours determine how toxic your relationship.
A relationship is classified to be toxic when it becomes draining, exhausting, and consuming. At this level, the relationship is no longer built on the foundation of mutualism but the basis that there is a ‘predator’ and a ‘prey’. The thin line between a ‘struggling’ relationship and a toxic relationship sometimes makes it difficult to differentiate both.
However, there are certain signs that you should look out for to decide if your relationship.
Seven Signs of a toxic relationship
• Unfaithfulness
Lack of commitment in a relationship is a notable sign of toxicity. At this point, the vows of loyalty pledged by both partners are discarded as they continue to enjoy affection in the arms of a third party.
• Dominance
A toxic relationship can be controlling and dominating. This rises as a result of distrust and suspicion. Questions are asked about where you are, who you interact with, controlling your actions, and movements making it impossible to own life you can call your own.
• Insincerity
Lies and dishonesty are major signs of toxic relationships. Whenever your relationship is filled with a lot of fairy tales to cover up lapses, then toxicity is creeping in.
• Disrespect
When partners do not accord some levels of respect to each other, such a relationship is likely becoming toxic.
• Negligence
Absence of care, ignoring your needs, and denying each other compassion is a red flag in a relationship.
• Lack of Trust
A relationship becomes toxic when parties involved always look over their shoulders or find it difficult to believe a word that the other said.
• Jealousy
Jealousy is the opposite of love and this could grow to an extent that you do not care about the progress of your partner.
How to walk away from a toxic relationship
Walking away from a toxic relationship is always a painful act but it is worth the process. Building enough strength to leave a toxic relationship is a sign of maturity.
The situations surrounding your decision to let go of a toxic relationship will only be valid if you take the bold step of leaving. Whether there is a child involved, you live together with your lover or you are still in love with your partner when acts of toxicity become overbearing in a relationship, you should leave.
Four steps to leaving a toxic relationship
• Decide to let go
No matter how difficult it could be, you must be able to whirl a lot of willpower to decide that you’ve had enough of the mess in the relationship.
You must convince yourself that you deserve a healthy relationship and you might not find one if you remain stuck in a bad relationship.
• Self-Realization
You must understand that breaking up with your partner will hurt. You must teach yourself self-love, build a significantly high level of self-esteem that ensures that you live without your partner.
During this self-realization, you should teach yourself to bear any pain that will result from breaking up and that the pains will only be temporary.
• Make the bold step
The process of calling it quits with a toxic relationship could differ for a lot of individuals and it is also dependent on the type of relationship you are involved in.
Toxic relationships like marriages might require a formal divorce while toxic relationships amongst lovers might require a discussion between parties involved.
Sometimes, you do not need the permission of your partner to walk away. You know what you want out of the relationship, waiting for your partner to change usually ends as an impossible task so the best you should do is to drop a note that it is over.
• Seek Support
Staying alone during a breakup phase might be painful and depressing, you need the company of friends to cheer you up, support, love, and encourage you throughout the phase.
Finding peace after a toxic relationship
What happens when you leave a toxic relationship remains a puzzle for a lot of people. Some individuals make the mistake of forcing themselves into another relationship with the mindset that they will find peace with a new lover.
The best way to derive peace after leaving a toxic relationship is by engaging in mental exercises, practicing Yoga, getting engaged regularly with fun activities, and embracing self-love.
You can heal from the wounds of a toxic relationship if you fill-up the open spaces with as much love as you can get from your friends and family. Moments after leaving a toxic relationship are times to evaluate yourself, appreciate your strengths, and work on your weaknesses.
Have you been in a toxic relationship before?
Let us hear your story and how you were able to break up.
